Validation is to get approval, confirmation, proof.
I find some days I am searching so hard for outside validation of myself. I want to have others approve of my choices; get confirmation I am “doing good”. Sometimes, I just need to be recognized for what I am proud of, what I have accomplished. This is my struggle, some days, not all days. I am sharing this with my readers, so that everyone understands I am not going to tell anyone they should not desire/seek outside validation. I know we all do…but I am going to tell you how the majority of the pride/self-worth you feel should come from within.
If you lose weight for someone else’s approval, you may get a small, short-lived, validating “good job” from them…but it won’t last. You won’t truly be proud of yourself. You won’t be able to stay motivated to keep it off. You won’t have really changed your life.
You have to be proud of the choices you make. You have to know, at the end of the day, only your opinion of you matters. If you like yourself, feel good about who you are, that’s validation.
You have to eat right, even when no one is around….workout when no one is looking…work hard at your job whether anyone says anything, or not…make healthy, long-lasting decisions for yourself without anyone’s approval.
Throughout your weight-loss journey, you will realize how many people will not give you the validation you have been seeking. There will be family members who will never, ever tell you they are proud of you. There will be friends who will never, ever give your new lifestyle their approval. There will be romantic partners that will never, ever say how impressed they are with your strength and courage. I say all of this in the form of extremes…you may have wonderfully supportive people all around you on your journey, but you need to be prepared for people who won’t give you the validation you think you need.
I want you to know that you have to change for you…for your health…for your self-image…for your self-confidence…for your happiness…for your bliss.